Where to begin?

Where to even begin?

We started this process soooo long ago that people must think I have made this whole adoption thing up & really there will never be a baby from China.

It feels ridiculous at this point but waiting is my new reality. We first decided in December 2004 to adopt from China. It took us a few months to find an agency - first we picked an agency that cost less but we did more of the leg work. We thought, 'sure, let's do some of the work & save some cash'. What were we thinking???? Did we not remember that Jim was working & traveling a ton .... I was running a business, starting a second business, chasing a 3 year old, and involved in tons of things?? I guess we momentarily forgot the complete reality of our lives!

In July of 2005, we switched agencies to Nightlight Christian Adoption Agency.

God has used this waiting time in amazing ways. There isn't enough blog to share all the ways God has used this entire adoption process to change us, grow us & stretch us. Our lives have already changed in such dramatic ways because of what we have had to go through as adoptive parents. When we had our first daughter there was just doctor check ups, ultrasounds, a child CPR class -- show up at the hospital & congratulations, you are parents!! This is so different - fingerprints, home study, autobiography, you name it - they want to know it :-).

I am thankful beyond words that God has chosen for me to not be pregnant & to have our 2nd daughter join our family in this way. God plan is truly perfect even if I don't understand all of it (or even parts of it). We are so excited to have Lily join our family ... and obviously, our lives will be even more changed once she arrives ..... more stretching, more growing & more changing.

Back in the summer of 2005, the wait time was about 6 months for adoptions from China. Our paperwork was logged into China's adoption system on January 26, 2006 (funny it was the same day that my company presented me with a White Mercedes Benz for my promotion. Maybe we should name her Mercedes? Not!). Can you imagine almost 14 months later that we are still waiting?

China has had an incredible slow down in their adoption time frames & we are stuck in the midst of this slow down (feels more like a halt to me but it is not). Last year I was telling people, she'll be here by Christmas. It must be groundhog day b/c I am still telling people, she should be here by Christmas. At least, I hope so!!!! Hence, her middle name, Hope. I think we are going to use the Chinese word for Hope but we need to find out the spelling / pronunciation for the biblical word for Hope in Chinese.

Of course, I want Lily here now but she is not & I refuse to be miserable for this entire waiting time. I have my moments of feeling a bit miserable about everything like "WHY, for the love of China, is this taking SOOOO long?!?!?!!?!?!" but I have chosen to spend my waiting time embracing life & focusing on the bright side of things. God has done more for me than I could ever think or imagine ... I can have nothing but gratitude ....here are a few things I am thankful for:
God's patience & His unconditional love.
A healthy, happy 5 year old daughter that loves life & performs a concert / dance routine for me at least once a day (if not hundreds of times a day).
Dear, trusted wonderful friends that accept me as I am ... flaws & all!
My husband.
An incredible church where I am challenged to serve the Lord & grow each day in my walk with Christ.
Parents that have encouraged me in every thing that I have ever done or attempted to do in my life.
My sisters that are just as eager to meet Lily as I am!
My Arbonne family that has supported me (& distracted) me during my wait for Lily!

What on earth could I complain about? I refuse to kvetch. Life is good. Enjoy it. You never know which breath will be your last.