May 7th

Live your life to the fullest & take time to "come on down".

May 7th, 2008 is a day I will never forget - taking my dear sister-in-law, Roisin, to Price is Right with her oldest daughter, Danielle.

Even though Roisin was very sick on hospice at that time, I didn't know that she would go home to Jesus exactly one month later. Roisin put on her incredible "Mom-face" & pushed herself very hard to make Danielle's Day special despite how horrible she was feeling. What a day it was - plus we bumped into Drew Carey on our way out of the handicap exit.

Today, one year later, we got great news about my nephew's tumor. A word we love: BENIGN!!!!! Thank you, Lord!!!! To say we are all thankful, grateful & overwhelmed with joy is a complete understatement! I just don't think I would have been able to stop crying if we were also dealing with David needing chemo.

Now for my sweet, precious, one & only 7 year old daughter, Hannah -- she continues to have to endure this road of Aplastic Anemia. A road that is just no fun even though I try to keep "Camp Hannah" rolling right along.

Today she had her port accessed. Yesterday they tried to do it twice but Hannah just lost it & couldn't endure them trying to get the needle in the port once more. She chose to have an IV placed in her arm for the night so she could still get her anti-biotics. Today, the surgeon that put her port in on December 4th came in & accessed her port without any problem at all. Hannah was SO relieved to see the blood return. Nothing brings her more relief!!!

This afternoon she had an ultrasound of her colon area. Hannah HATES ultrasounds. Truly, she'd prefer an MRI, CT SCAN, surgery .. pretty much, anything. I don't know why, she just does. She cried & screamed through the entire ultrasound. At one point I just felt like she was just crying to get it all out .. crying & screaming about everything cruddy that she feels from these past 5 months. Truly another one of those tremendously heart breaking moments on this journey.

Lily & I got out for a bit today. It was so nice to just "play normal life" for a few hours. She played in the water park at the mall & had fun getting all wet since it was about 100 degrees. It took her a bit to figure out that the water was there for her enjoyment but then she got into all the fun! She is now at home sound asleep in her crib...while I am here with Hannah at the hospital. I can't describe how torn my heart is .... but not being here at the hospital is just not an option.

For me, I know the emotions from the past 5 months have just been pouring out after all we have been through - and realizing that there is still a lot of road ahead.

I am a firm believer that God DOES give us more than we can handle so that we will run to Him to be our strength. Thank you, Lord, that You are my strength! I am tired. I am weary but You are carrying me through. Thank you that I can trust You to direct our path for Hannah's treatment plan. Thank you that You bring blessings on this broken road & provide for us in ways we never could have imagined.


"I have called upon You, for You will hear me, O God; Incline Your ear to me, and hear my speech. Show Your marvelous loving kindness by Your right hand, O You who save those who trust in You." -- Psalm 17:6-7a