Hannah & I have been keeping some pretty crazy hours & truly it is hard to remember what day it is. Basically when the night nurse shows up we are welcoming her to our "day hours". Today we slept until noon after going to bed sometime around 5AM!?!?!
Hannah's white blood cell count (WBC) did not drop but it also did not increase. It is still at .4 (it should be a minimum of 4.5!!). I was hoping the WBC would have increased but at least it did not drop ... for that I am thankful! She received platelets today. On a positive note, she did not have a fever today -- thank you, Lord!!!
I left the hospital today around 1pm to be home with Lily. She enjoyed bath time, playing, eating & taking a nap in bed with Momma!! She is so so so so so sweet & I just had to not think about all I am missing with her right now or she'd be wondering why mommy was banging her head on the floor screaming "WHY!?!?!". Thank you, God, that she isn't missing an ounce of love while she is camping out the Slazas family -- that girl is L-O-V-E-D!!!
Hannah had a fun day at the hospital with Jim -- they colored, played Wii & even had a "surprise" visit from Hannah's 1st grade teacher (it was a surprise to Hannah but not to us :-)! I know seeing her teacher a real treat for Hannah, as her visitors are VERY few & far between. Her teacher is W-O-N-D-E-F-U-L and full of kindness, love & care for Hannah.
Realizing how critically ill Hannah is has hit me at the strangest times. One day while we were at NIH, the girl in the room next to Hannah was being wheeled to the Operating Room. I happened to be in the hall at the time & I looked at her on the gurney thinking, 'oh my goodness, that little girl is SOOOO sick. Wow - she is SO sick." Then it really hit me, "OH MY LORD! We are here at the NIH with OUR little girl -- SHE is SOOO sick." I don't know why the severity of Hannah's illness hit me hard at that moment but I will never forget the impact of that as long as I live.
Today I asked one of the nurses about a 10 year old boy we met on the ward that was just diagnosed 2 weeks ago with metastasized cancer. She told me that he went home. I thought, 'HE went home!?!...if he went home, what are WE STILL doing here??!!!?!?!' Oh my.
Constantly I have to redirect the focus of my heart to simply "Trust in the Lord with ALL my heart and not lean on my own understanding". I can't dwell on what kind of medical catastrophe this is for my sweet Hannah. Above all things, I know that God has not forgotten Hannah (or any of us) for even one millisecond. Hannah (and all of us) are in His thoughts 24/7/365. He will not slumber, He will not sleep. Thank you, Jesus!!
Sunday, January 4, 2009
What day is it?
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5 comments:
WOW! you're having a slumber party at night? That's awesome.
We continue to pray for sweet Hannah and your family. In the mist of all, GOD is good and HE is great. HE will not give us what we cannot handle and HE chose your family because of great reasons. Hang in there! This shall pass and one day it will be just a distant memory!
Hope your day is going good, for you guys. I am praying for all good news to come soon along with going home!!! I know all to well how being in the hospital for so long how your world gets turned upside down. Hope you guys get to go home soon.
Melisa
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacobshope
Debbie, I am so thankful for your continued posts. So many times I think of you and Hannah and Lily and Jim at the most incovenient times, so I love that I can find out how you all are doing online anytime I think of you! Know that you are continually in our prayers!
Debbie,
I just wanted you to know that I continue to pray for Hannah daily. I also pray for you as well. You never get good sleep in a hospital, and it gets sooooo exhausting. You are probably sooooo exhausted and warn out. I hope Hannah's wbc count will come up soon. I wish that all of this would soon come to an end for all of you. May god continue to give you the strength to get through each day.
Love Ya grl friend,
Misty
Debbie, I am continually praying...I check in daily and sweet Hannah is always on my heart which means I am always praying ;) Praying for Lily, you, and daddy :)
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